No ke aha ʻoe e kamaʻilio ai me nā malihini

Anter

• Nā kiko kī
• ʻO ka makaʻala nui loa e hoʻonele iā mākou i nā pilina
• E kamaʻilio me kahi malihini

Nā kiko kī

• ʻO nā leka e pili ana i nā keiki e nalo ana ua hoʻonāukiuki ka makaʻu i nā mākua, a laila mālama lākou i ke ʻano pale a makaʻala.
• Ua aʻo ʻo Gen Z a me Millennial, ʻaʻole e kamaʻilio pū me nā malihini, ua ulu a aʻo ʻole pehea e launa pū ai me nā malihini.
• Ma ke ʻano he nohona kaiaulu, pono mākou e launa pū me nā mea ʻē aʻe ʻaʻole wale e hoʻopau i nā mea, akā e mālama pono hoʻi i ko mākou ola naʻau.

I ka makahiki 1979, ua nalowale ʻo Etan Patz nona ka makahiki 6 i kona hele ʻana i kāna hale kaʻa kau kaʻa ma Manhattan lalo. A laila, i ka makahiki 1981 me ka nalo ʻana o Adam Walsh, ua hau ka lāhui. Ua ʻike ʻia nā kiʻi a nā keiki e nalo ana ma nā pahu waiū no nā keiki e nānā ʻoiai lākou e ʻai nei i nā kīʻaha o ka palaoa kakahiaka. ʻO nā palena e pili ana i nā mea a nā keiki e hiki ai a ʻaʻole hiki ke hoʻololi.

Ma mua o kēlā mau hanana hoʻowahāwahā a hoʻolaha nui ʻia, ua kākau wau i kahi puke liʻiliʻi, "ʻAʻole maikaʻi maikaʻi ka ʻaikalima," ma muli o kahi hōʻike nūhou o kahi kāne ʻē aʻe i kahi kaʻa polū e kokoke ana i ke kula haʻahaʻa o kaʻu keiki hānau. Hoʻolālā ʻia ka puke liʻiliʻi e ka mākaʻi a me nā kula, a me nā mākua. A laila lilo ia i puke Mai ʻōlelo ʻē i kahi malihini: Ka mea a kāu keiki e ʻike ai e noho palekana a ua paʻi ʻia ma nā ʻano like ʻole i mau makahiki. Ua kōkua nā moʻolelo a me nā leka i nā mākua a me nā mea aʻo e aʻo i nā keiki ʻōpio i ka ʻokoʻa ma waena o nā malihini maikaʻi a kōkua maikaʻi a me nā mea e hōʻeha iā lākou. Ua hoʻolālā ʻia e hoʻolako i nā pono hana e pono ai nā keiki ʻōpio e palekana inā aia lākou iā lākou iho, mālama ʻole ʻia.

ʻO nā leka uila e pili ana i nā keiki nalowale, i kekahi manawa kuhi hewa no ka hana ʻole e hoʻokaʻawale i waena o nā keiki i ʻauheʻe a me nā mea i lawe ʻia, nā mākua paniku a laila kaohi nui i nā kūʻokoʻa o nā keiki. Ua hoʻomaka nā mākua i ke kau ʻana a noho i kahi kūlana palekana loa, makaʻala.

ʻO ka makaʻala nui loa e hoʻonele iā mākou i nā pilina

I loko o kāna puke, ʻO kou huli: Pehea e lilo ai i makua, Kūkākūkā ʻo Julie Lythcott-Haims i ka hopena o ka neʻe ʻana o kahi neʻe a me ka hopena o ka micromanaging i kā mākou poʻe keiki i nā ʻōpio makua i kēia lā a "alakaʻi iā lākou e akahele a ʻo ka hopena [lākou] e nalo nei pehea e hana ai i nā pilina i kī i ko mākou hauʻoli pākahi. . ”

ʻO kāna mokuna, "Hoʻomaka e kamaʻilio me nā malihini," wehe me ka ʻōlelo puana, "Mai kamaʻilio me nā malihini," i hoʻopiʻi ʻia i "ʻO kēlā me kēia." He kuhihewa kēlā, kākau ʻo ia:

"No laila, hānai ʻia ka hapa nui o nā keiki Millennial a me Gen Z me ka mantra 'Mai kamaʻilio me nā malihini.' ʻAʻole pili kēia i ka launa waha me nā malihini a ʻoiaʻiʻo ʻaʻole hele pū me lākou i kēlā me kēia wahi. Akā ua morphed i ka hana maka ʻole ʻana me nā malihini, a ʻaʻohe chitchats liʻiliʻi me nā malihini ma nā ala hele wāwae a i ʻole nā ​​hale kūʻai. A laila lilo ia i mea hōʻole loa i nā malihini. Ua ulu a nui nā keiki ʻaʻole makaʻu wale i ka manaʻo maoli o nā malihini, akā ʻaʻole maoli ʻike pehea e launa pū ai me lākou. ʻO ka hopena, ʻaʻole aʻo nā kamaliʻi i ka hoʻokele ʻana i nā ʻike kaiāulu i hāʻawi ʻia e kekahi mea a lākou i ʻike ʻole ai. A laila puka lākou mai ke kula kiʻekiʻe a hele i ka honua, kahi i piha ai ko lākou ola. . . malihini.

"Eia kahi mea kikoʻī loa paha aʻu e hōʻike ai i loko o kēia puke. A laila, ma kekahi ʻano, lilo mākou i kamaʻāina me kekahi o nā malihini (mua), a ʻo kekahi o ia mau kamaʻāina e lilo i mau hoanoho, hoa aloha, hoa hana, alakaʻi, aloha, hoa hui, a me ka ʻohana. Hōʻike ka noiʻi mai nā māla o ka biology evolution, anthropology, a me ka psychology kaiaulu he ʻano kaiāulu nui mākou e launa pū me ka lokomaikaʻi me kekahi me kekahi ʻaʻole wale no ka hoʻopau ʻana i nā mea akā maikaʻi ka naʻau. Hōʻike ka noiʻi i ka launa pū ʻana me ka poʻe e noho malihini mau iā mākou (ʻo ia hoʻi, ke kanaka ma ke alanui e hele aʻe ana) he hopena maikaʻi maikaʻi ko mākou. "

E kamaʻilio me kahi malihini

Ma ka holo kaʻa ʻōhua ma New York City i mau makahiki i hala aku nei ua lohe au i kahi mau wahine e kūkākūkā ana no kahi hale ʻaina aʻu i makemake ai e ʻike. No laila ma mua o ka eavesdrop, ua noi wau iā lākou e haʻi iaʻu e pili ana i ia. Hoʻomaka mākou e kamaʻilio. Coincidentally, noho kekahi o nā wahine kokoke iaʻu a ua lilo i hoa pili. Ua hana pū mākou i nā mea he nui i mua o ke kūlanakauhale a ua lilo mākou i mea kākoʻo naʻau kekahi i kekahi. Ke hōʻike maikaʻi nei ka CDC i ka hoʻomau hou ʻana i ka launa me nā mea ma waho o kā mākou poloka, maopopo nō wau e hoʻomaka hou ana i ko mākou alo aloha he alo he alo — he hoʻokahi i hānau ʻia ma ke kamaʻilio ʻana me kahi malihini.

Ua hōʻike ka maʻi ahulau i kēlā me kēia makahiki o kā mākou makahiki, pono mākou i ka pilina maka-i ka maka-ʻaʻole nā ​​ʻaoʻao o ka "hoaaloha" i ka pāpili kaiaulu, akā ʻo ka poʻe hiki iā mākou ke nānā i ka maka, a, ʻapo hou hou. Inā hānai ʻia ʻoe ma lalo o ka mantra o "Mai kamaʻilio pū me nā malihini," ʻoluʻolu ʻole ke hoʻokumu ʻana i kēlā mau pilina ma ka mua, akā e like me kā Lythcott-Haims e hoʻomanaʻo ai i ka poʻe heluhelu, "ʻaʻole maikaʻi wale ke kamaʻilio pū me nā malihini, makemake ʻoe. Pono ʻoe. Hāele pū."